Anyone ask you how much a bj cost yet? That shirt is so whorish
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
I just tried to roll over and fell off the bed. I think that is the beds way of kicking me out
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
But on the plus side, what he lacked in size he made up for with speed. And grunting.
We were walking to the bar with a group of people and literally made 4 stops in people's lawns garages or random walls for him to eat me out
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
Randomize
