Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
So i just found out i replied to my room mates craigslist ad. Akward
She gave me a bj in her parent's kitchen while I ate the rest of her mom's birthday cake. Fuck. Yes.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
I feel like everything in this room is sweating
You just kept walking around saying "my brain is soup" then sat on the kitchen counter washing your feet. You bit the guy that tried to help you down
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Bro I needs to be rescued in 30 mins...prfeebly someone died in a car accident needs to be the excuse
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Woke up in my boxers on a subway with a phone number written on my arm in lipstick..Best Night EVER.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
