you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
You said you wanted to start a restaurant called 'Barbecue' where everything is barbecued. You sounded really proud of your concept.
In other more interesting news I'm going to arrange a surprise orgy. You in?
I really wanna just be like, can you just eat me out and stop whining
I think that would solve a million problems
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
Ick. That's not even the fun kind of punishment.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
Would you like to get a drink then hook up or reverse order I don't really care. Hopefully you can keep this between us.
Randomize
