i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
Just saw a Mexican guy pushing a stroller with 3 twelve packs of corona in it with a toddler struggling to keep up on foot behind him
standing in the yard with no pants on waiting for google maps to come and take a picture.
What do you mean when you say no pre-party sex?
Right before he passed out, he said "Stuporman, coming in for a landing"
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Too bad you can't keep me under your desk. You'd love that wouldn't you? Massages, blowjobs, and I'd be forced to be quiet all day.
Well, it's either jungle juice or memory of the night... It's unfortunate I can't have both
Well going home with a Ralph Lauren model helped me get over him real fuckin' quick. Would recommend it for all women going through breakups
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
I couldn't finish the episode and had to lay down because the snapple commercial with the mustache was blowing my mind
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Clearly you've confused me for someone who has their shit together, and honestly I have no idea how you did that.
Dude, naked camping ALWAYS takes precedence. I would skip my own funeral to go naked camping.
Randomize
