Reminder- he's a douche bag. A big one.
Dude, I don't think I'll ever be able to find a girl for me...
Is this the gay conversation?
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
he asked me to smell his eyeballs.
what part of what i said meant "bring a bowl"
"bouncy castle"
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
I just saw that blonde chick you wanna bang rolling down the hall wearing a Thor mask..
Wow. We're meant to be..
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
I wouldn't be surprised. You and I have basically synced up our brain chemistry by doing drugs together in the same way that two girls would sync their menstrual cycles by sharing a house.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
that's just what you get for learning massage techniques from gay porn
Just turned down sex because it's a holy day of obligation, my mom would be proud.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
Randomize