Job is the problem. Drinking, the solution.
who's fault is it that she tells me today she is only 16 because i definately met her at the bar...
angela screamed across the room SHES A CHAMP when i told the pharmacist plan b doesnt make me throw up
hey, when you wake up, search yourself on youtube
my sister already found it, were watching it right now. i give it 2 thumbs up.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
he referred to his penis as the bashful dwarf from snow white
Just traded the drive-through guy at BK a Dos Equis for a Hershey pie before noon... win?
They switched jackets and you didn't notice. You made out with both of them and had no idea
You had sex with a guy who has a purple beard last night. No Molly for a while, ok?
Also, you fell asleep with you hand on and around my cock last night.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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