is it bad that the cashier at chick-fil-a shouted "see you tomorrow!" as i drove away?
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
Woman walking into toby keith concert: 8 months pregnant, black eye, shirt on that has a picture of a boot and the words "we'll put a boot up your ass" with an american flag printed over--the sleeves were ripped off and she had a camo cowboy hat. Greatest thing I've ever seen.
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Want to come over? I'm getting stoned and watching Netflix and making s'mores over a candle in my room
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
If you really loved me, you'd support my weed habit.
As the person who squeezed you out of my vagina, the answer is no.
Wound up hungover. Visiting 4 y/o nephew suggested cookies and milk and playing Kirby with him with the sound down. This kid is going places.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
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