i was drunk at family dinner telling about my gay brothers sex ads on criags list
its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
You passed out and she managed to carry you all the way back to your dorm last night. I believe your testicles now her property.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
all i want in life is a shot and a cock is that too much to ask
And if you put this on Facebook, I will drop live cockroaches in your mouth while you sleep and then smother you with a pillow.
You always say the most romantic things
like, there should be nothing wrong with me wanting to watch you put on a bikini and roll around in a kiddie pool of jello
you tried to drunkinly do the backflip kick off of karate kid and broke the big screen
She was crying and pulled the collar of her shirt up to blot the tears. And then she just kept her head there. And stopped crying. "My boobs are just too amazing for me to cry." her words not mine please help she's still in that position
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