you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
This morning my doorman told me it was an accomplishment for me to be standing and conscious after last night.
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Real friends wouldn't let me shotgun a 4loko after already seeing me trying to eat a girl out through her jeans.
grown man stumbling drunk down green street wearing nothing but a hot dog costume and crying. its not even noon yet.
So just to get a feel for things...how prone are you to male Amish strippers...
Yeah dude, it's amazing. Be careful though, that shit is really really intense. Like it's way more intense than normal shit...
I took two and feel like crushed diamonds spread over glazing marmalade
And the funny thing is when I went to the kitchen this morning, all 4 pizzas were still there in their boxes, untouched. My question to you is: what were we eating last night?
You always seem to be able to bribe me with tequila and Mac and cheese. This relationship of ours will cause me health problems someday.
My buddy just got straight up kicked out of the bar on my bday for water boarding people with beer and bar towels
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
so i may or may not have just had sex on the stage of the lecture hall....
We've been here for 9 days, so of course I am high at my in-laws' house.
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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