Did u get laid? I went and bought lube and fleshlighted it while moaning ur name the whole time.
god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
I don't think I can look at him the same way anymore after he walked in my room wearing a short skirt with a boner.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
I didn't see her "bad karma" tattoo until after I was balls deep
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
Somebody broke the sliding door, and someone ripped the toilet seat off the toilet. So yeah, pretty typical friday night
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
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