Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Side note: THE ORIGINAL LION KING IS COMING THE MOVIES AGAIN--3D STYLE. We need to find shrooms.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
He is stood at the top of the stairs nursing the stolen cat
Hey, met you at the bar last night. You probably dont remember my name. You and your friends came back to my place, you shattered my window with your fist then dipped. Your gonna need to pay for that.
Thats where this cut came from! Thanks for piecing together the puzzle dude.
You get home okay?
I'm pantless and in bed
That doesn't mean you're at home.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
I think even the taco bell employees judged me
He casually compared computer science to childbirth and I was like "hey, as someone who has wanted to fuck you for six months now, could you please never talk about childbirth ever again"
Randomize
