I murdered the dance floor call the cops
"Reality" and all separate lives are the same thing?... We all have separate realities?! My life Has one reality and yours has another?
Haha how much did you smoke
4 feet of smokeee!
we black-lighted her bedspread and it looked like a jackson pollock painting.
I woke up on a futon with 2 stolen budwiesers in my purse, 5 extra bucks, a sucker stuck to my shoe, one sock, and a stolen copy of the zombie survival guide
please tell me this is not legit
They were actually really boring considering how we met them.
howd you meet them?
They got shit-faced and decided to take a train to a city none of them had ever been to. We found them wandering the ghetto, with a bottle of gin and singing Disney songs.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
We could make it cute. Like "oh those two cute lesbians who are about five foot two who sell the cocaine down the street. You know the ones? With the Yorkies?"
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
There are no female cereal mascots. I just realized that in my drunken state... So sexist...
I can assure you I didn't go home with a girl, because I woke up on someone's porch
Every time I start to trust vodka, it does this to me.
I got to walk around for eight hours wearing power armor and acting camp. No way I wouldn't love it.
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
Randomize
