Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
I am tired of kissing girls with mustaches.
Vanessa Carlton's songs would be so much better if she was pretty
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
What's the most polite way to ask if you puked in my vase?
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
We are casual work acquaintances that occasionally fuck when the urge strikes. CWATOFWTUS. I know FWB rolls off the tongue better but it is what it is.
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
Dude, I checked into a cathedral... I thought it was a joke, until I found a candle and a whole bunch of coins in my purse
You sent me a picture of you licking the bottom of a shoe and the caption was "it tastes like shoe"
So I walked in on her and she had taped her fingers together and was crying and was whispering something about "how humbling it is being in constant glove mode"
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
Randomize
