You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
Is it sanitary to roast marshmallows over a cigarette lighter?
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
They live so far away from me that not fucking them both would have been financially irresponsible
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
When I was with you my penis felt like a fat woman crammed into a pair of lulu lemons
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
You are my mentor.
I drank wine out of a protein shake bottle last night. You may want to rethink that statement.
I feel like if anyone knew what an affection erection looked like it would be you
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
Was having the best sex dream I've had in a while and only woke up when I heard my grandma fall down the stairs.
What do you mean not that crazy? I had sex last night. with my\nBOSS. in the restaurant where we WORK.... ON A DINNER TABLE.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
WHAT THE FUCK HAPPENED. WHO CAME HOME WITH ME. WHAT THE FUCK RESPOND ASAP I AM SO CONFUSED
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