The pink midgets playing hockey is the EXACT reason cold meds and alcohol do not mix. Period.
those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I just saw a Puerto Rican child between the ages of 8 and 11 with a faint mustache talking very loudly on the bluetooth in his ear about how "Skittles are played the fuck out"
Christmas on farmville was waaaaay better than my actual Christmas.
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
I wish I still had pics from the prostitute I paid/dated
judging by the mobile uploads you added of me last night, we cant keep living this way.
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
Out of everyone here, the sober one caught the cat on fire.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
The number of mornings I actually have to say out loud to myself "you must put pants on and go to work" to get motivated is...troubling.
Go to a building you've never been before and take a shit. It's marvelous
Randomize
