So drunk, too bad you don't want this
The jonas brothers playing in your laptop. This is why guys won't sleep with you...
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Is it true if I say your name three times, you'll appear and whore everything up?
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Dude. Cvs sells sex toys. And my discount works on them. Game on.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Just want to let you know thanks for setting the bar pretty low when it comes to girls.
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
Apparently stoned me thought eating chips in the shower was a good idea.
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
Randomize
