Can you please check on Jay? He just called and left a Backstreet Boys song on my voicemail. Either it's 1998, or someone needs to go back to rehab.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
At this point I just want to meet a man with a job.
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
It's like a new game! Find out if he's circumcised without actually seeing it
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
If anyone remembers any details of tonight please address concerns to my lawyer. This is a mass text.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Randomize
