Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
someone threw a dead crab at me
my lips still taste like vagina
so you liked breakfast?
ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
Impressive. I've never gotten straight denied and then chased the guy naked out of my own apt. I'll remember that next time.
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
Randomize
