i just peed in a port a potty and wiped with my credit card statement. fuck yeah!
When you come back do you think I could print anorexic pictures of Mary-Kate?
which bright sisters idea was it to put semi-formal in the middle of no-shave november?
You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
I just threw up in the bathroom next to the zebra exhibit. The kids don't know I skipped a beat. Best nanny, ever.
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
I feel like I got run over by a bus full of inebriated Scotsmen on the way to a soccer riot.
And if I could both stabilize myself *and* pick things up with my penis... Well, I wouldn't be on the fire dept...
okay we need to get tested.
no YOU need to get tested. I'm just going along for the ride.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
My pizza delivery guy was so hot I was like omg please let this be the beginning of a porno
Maybe life is about finding the person you DO want to cuddle with after they rail you like a porn star
Let's just say when I woke up I was still drunk. My hangover hit me around noon so I chilled w my dad and took a bath and shower at the same time. You just can't do that at college
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