pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
Floor bacon is actually really good
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
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