i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
you kept yelling at her to "show me your genitals" until the bouncers told us to leave...at which point you showed them YOUR genitals...
please don't ever take me to a strip club again...
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
i feel like his penis is a security blanet. i cant fall asleep unless its in my hand
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
ROOF CAVED IN, WE'RE GUNNA MAKE A WATERSLIDE
The bouncer called to give me my shoes back when I got there he said " I'm all cool with fuvking bitches but when you try to to do it in my bar on the pool table you're gonna get chocked out every time"
At least you got your shooes
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
I almost wanna stick a tampon in and sneeze bent over to see if it actually shoots out
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
It will be the shitshow of all shitshows.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
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