handjob tips. give me some.
And I'm supposed to be surprised that you got another concussion?
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
He offered me a trade. He'll come sober to my parents 25th anniversary dinner if I let him tie me up for an hour.
Update. bondage is a lot harder than it looks.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
Free stuff before I even put his balls in my mouth like wow great start
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
He dicked me, fed me creme brulee, and didn’t make a big deal out of me causing a flood to come outta my vagina
Marry him NOW
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