Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
I just saw the Donald Trump of homeless quys walking down the street. He had three shopping carts and a bike.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
only my mom would pack illegal paraphernalia in a care package..
he emptied an entire bag of goldfish onto the bed and rolled around yelling the theme to jaws trying to eat them
He wants to call Lloyd's of London and have my mouth insured.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
Do you remember coming over and asking for toast and then singing that yeah toast song very loudly while you were dropping my bread all over my kitchen?
I need to start journaling my drunk thoughts. Drunk me is fucking brilliant & sober me is missing out.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
According to the office gossip the new secretary is “a homewrecking whore”. Think I should spend $27 on a fake wedding ring?
Yes! Want that picture of you and my nephew?
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