YEA!!! I'll throw you a non-baby shower.
I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
I just put a picture of what I imagine Rob's dick looks like on it on my vision board. thank you Oprah!
woke up in Sigma Chi. In his room. they are iniating pledges right now. Holy fucking shit mother of pearl.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
Is it sad that I woke up to more "Happy Holidays" texts on 4/20 than I did on Christmas?
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
I vote intervention dinner around 6, make up movie around 7:30ish, then apology drinks all night. Then hangover waffle house in the morning.
This is America. Deny every slut accusation or own up to it
It is super hard to find a good vegan dominatrix! THAT'S why I'm single
Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat. Gotta get dat dat dat dat dat ~uterus contraction~
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
When I type "sleep" my phone suggests "with Trevor". My phones an asshole.
We went to the midnight donut shop and you hopped the counter and told everyone to "Get the Fuck out of your Bar" but to also "Make yourselves at home".
This is the most exciting thing since movie theater hand jobs
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