If a fat man falls in the shower and nobody is in the apartment, does his pride still hurt? Answer: yes
I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
she peed. on the sidewalk. it is 2 pm. Help.
Less talking, more tequila
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
Sitting topless in my room drinking wine from a box... It's good to be back at school
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
i almost got into an argument defending my life choices with a guinea pig eating chocolate cake at 4am
I don't want to sleep with any other woman but you but I want to try this whole mother daughter thing that would be nuts
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
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