Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
I jusy said out loud "gingers unite in the middle of the night"
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
If turning my entire backyard into a slip-n-slide is wrong then I don't wanna be right
Februarys looking very promising in the vaginal department
Hey. I can't work your space dryer so I'm wearing your blanket home. I'll get my clothes later. Fun party!
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Youre a wreck. Youll be in your dorm weeping to project runway covered in pizza sauce and smelling of stale beer
you have 30 seconds to convince me not to grab this guy's crotch in front of his girlfriend
And I’m prepared, because I'm in it to win it (and by win I mean get railed hard)
Randomize
