Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
it hurts more in the daytime
Studying for the exam.. Identifying the portraits using phrases like "large penis"
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
There's a Sam Adams brew house. How were we not supposed to go
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
I feel like I've been hit by a truck, flew up and landed on a fence post that went straight through my vagina. No more vodka and sex for a while.
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
I peed sitting down because I knew standing was a lost cause
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
I'm a delicate orchid of a man.
Blossoming into a fierce dragon.
Randomize
