Worst sexual experience IN MY LIFE. And now i know why it makes jesus cry.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
Told him I'd blow him in the bathroom. There was a giant window everyone was looking thru. He whipped it out n I burst out laughing n walked away. Even blackout drunk I set the bar high. You should be proud.
Nothing brings people closer than bonding over tequila shots and running from campus security.
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Maybe he injected his testicle?
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Randomize