Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
well..after leaving the bar you handed me your wallet and said you didnt need it cause you were going to find the cash cab and added 'i'll see you on tv'
Thanks for stealing lime trees for me at 4:00 am. We're well on our way to having sustainable supplies for mojitos this summer.
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
This is going to be the summer remembered forever as the giant 3 month long mushroom trip.
Just found the last picture of me as a virgin. Framed it.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
WHAT IS MY LIFE THAT THE ONLY PERSON INTERESTED IN FUCKING ME IS MY 6TH GRADE MATH TEACHER
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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