I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
it only takes four glasses of wine for me to ride an elephant with a stranger.
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
How bad does the situation have to be before its ok to attempt 'catastrophic event sex'?
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
So if I tell her fire is hot and it will burn her... she's probably just going to keep throwing her vagina at it huh?
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
Randomize