i just saw someone i know on True Life. i need new friends.
just broke no shave november. hello backed up drain december.
You yelled "GET TO DA CHOPPA" and burst through her screen door and disappeared into the night. With the goose.
He wanted to take a picture with our pizza to show his mom that I was pretty but more importantly that he practices in "sober" activities
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
The following message is brought to you by IMSOFUCKINGSORRY. Dude I'm really sorry I got you arrested last night. You are allowed to choose a repayment plan from the following options: Money, weed, or a single kick to the balls any time within the next calender months. Repayment outside of the aforementioned options can be negotiated and considered within reason.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
It's not too terrible. You just got a little naked and broke your arm.
Literally breaking up to my boyfriend while jamming out to Feraglicious
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
Emergency thong? Check! Suspension bondage is a go!
i woke up this morning wearing my pants as a scarf and my shirt as a daiper, my boyfriends contact name in my phone is "human sacrifice" and yours is "i like eggs"....can someone please tell me what happened last night
WHY are you masturbating to hockey fights?
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