I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
This girls a $30 bar tab from being bi
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
I hate vagina strikes, but I must not stray from my path. My boyfriend will know the true meaning of blue balls.
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
I just used Bacardi to dry out poison ivy.
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
Have you actually looked at the corn flakes box? I don't think the rooster has a soul.
Randomize
