Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Using pot as a way to stop crying probably isn't a good sign huh?
Meh, some people pop Prozac, you smoke weed. Po-tay-to. po-tah-to
I may or may not have screamed I'M ON A BOAT while having sex...on a boat. I think I was born to have sex with him.
Dubbing lion king over planet earth. That stoned.
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
He just fingered me to the Lion King soundtrack. And when he left he turned dramatically and said "I'll be back after work. Be prepared." Taint ALL the childhood memories.
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
Also, nothing screams "don't talk to me because I'm unstable" like walking around eating cookie dough out of the package.
THIS IS NOT A DECISION I MADE AT ONE IN THE MORNING IM JUST GETTING AROUND TO TELLING YOU ABOUT IT NOW
i wore just an American flag as my costume-huge success. 20 people pledged allegiance to my ass including a senior frat boy at the keg. God bless America.
Tomorrow I need you to slap me in the face. I'll explain then
Let's celebrate our country being screwed by screwing.
Would it be totally wrong, that in honor of princess leias death, I role played as her??
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
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