she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
i just saw my boxers from 2 days ago stuck in a tree 4 miles from my house
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
You went around chanting "dinosaur period" and drinking tomato soup from the can.
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
I suggest absurd amounts of masturbation this weekend to build up the necessary calluses
I think I'm going to give him a welcome back to single life blow job
He's tying my arms above my head and all I can think is that I should've shaved my armpits
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
The lady in the stall next to me just screamed "why are you so hairy!?" and "why can't you get any!?" to her vagina. WTF
Randomize