You can't special order awesome
how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
didn't have any spoons so I beer bonged my chicken noodle soup. I fucking love camping.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
just saw a guy driving a atv down the highway in a tux.... only in Iowa...
Going to the hospital for stitches on my balls. Mom walked in on me manscaping with an electric razor. Tell NOBODY.
You're either a hooker or Beyonce. Beyonce is abnormally good at doing everything in heels
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
I refuse to believe this is a lapse in my dick hunting skills. It's gotta be the gods playing a game.
Randomize
