I'm surprised I didn't puke tonight
He disabled his match.com account in front of me
ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
Thanksgiving. A stoners favorite holiday
We folded our dollar bills into airplanes. This really makes the strippers work for it. Like air miles.
she would be the type to have more hair on her twat than on her head
she has to be all "alternative"
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
I just don't understand how we smoked the EXACT same thing and I feel fine but Tim's over here serenading his fifth bowl of fruit loops with Elton John's entire discography.
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Haha, I gave you the rest of the cash I had on me and you bought 3 shots for yourself and beer for everybody except me FUCKFACE.
Just make it a game! Like 20 questions STD style.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
It's next to that place that has cock fighting.
Randomize
