Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
fireball beer pong. youre missing out
how is that even possible?
ove gloves.
be there in ten.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
yeah we were the ones eating jello shots out of the back of a jeep in the bar parking lot
My asshole is basically a geyser at this point. Minus the excitement. Plus blood.
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Do you miss the park or do you miss us having sex in public?
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
We were in the uber and you were crying because you wanted to be an Olympic gymnast. The driver tried to console you and you just cried harder
We watched ESPN, hooked up, got waffles. You know, a typical weekend.
mid-sex she goes "oh my god. you aren't even going to remember my name in the morning, are you?". And i was so wasted that i straight up told her "honestly, I don't even remember your name right now"
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
