Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
connan obrien reminds me of an asparagus spear
Margaritas are 250 calories. Now measuring all food in margaritas
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Im going to buy a thermometer. If its above 104 im going to the hospital if its under 104 im going to the bar
Uh oh I Hage to dance yes, my feet are Whitney Houston
Watching him and my sister argue over a rum and coke about who's going to chop the coffee table in half with a hatchet...
Hey, I shot that toilet dead center, drunk, from at least 6 ft away. I'm a fuckin awesome shot. You guys were completely safe.
Yes, that toilet won't be hurting anyone anymore.... Hahaha
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
Randomize
