i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
So about class tomorrow..... i,ll be there. But I may be still a bit drink and wearing a suit. I'll explain when I get there.
dude she snuck out while I was still sleeping then was banging on the door 10 minutes later cuz her car was brokedown. how was I suppose to recognize her??
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I want to throw all of their shoes in the pool so I feel like there is some justice in the world
If she has AMC, I may have to fuck her today. I want to catch up on the walking dead.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
I am drunk please bring Taco Bell and sex
Never mind I found pizza just bring sex
I was wasted and the time changed. I blame the male strippers.
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
long story short... we may or may not have lost your car.
Randomize
