You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
WTF YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND?
Oh yeah that.
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
the last thing i remember is yelling at the cab driver that i'm really good at drive by vomitting.
Last comment. I know of no exercises, diets or practices out there to help keeping balls young and healthy. They simply succumb to gravity.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I'm dressed in all sequins still at 9:30 in the morning and the worst part is that I actually still fit in in Vegas
Yeah. Got a major ego boost when she said she felt like she had just fucked King Arthur. Buying some donuts later to celebrate with, wanna join?
I stopped his blowjob to raise 3 fingers & whistle the hunger games tune to the people walking past the window
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Listen, yo... we need to have a serious conversation about this Dollar Store toilet paper. Because if I’m going to finger someone’s ass, it’s not going to be my own.
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