There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
This isn't the rejection hotline, is it?
my mom just found my flavored lube in the basement. she gave me a lecture about how "giving head is degrading" omg i feel sooooo bad for my dad
Banging bitches in a bar bathroom is not legit as it was in college, there are no fistpumps afterward only shame
as we waited for a manager to come open the door that we broke while having sex on the wall, we decided to go round two in the hallway before he came back.. god i love hotels.
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
The guy next to me just said he wont play beer pong on principle. Im scared.
We had sex on the beach. I was completely naked except for my sneakers. That's when you know
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
I can not be a lesbian living on Beaverland.
we had sex in his office so i figured it was appropriate to like his company's page on facebook
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
I have four things I would like to do over summer too... Problem is they're all roommates
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
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