i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
I just sneezed and had an orgasam..THAT turned on
She took a break from repeating "my face is still buzzing!" to say that the phantom of the opera could be here
Did you know you could bring s cooler of beer to the nail salon?
took off my bra and popcorn fell out of it. im gonna puke at this wedding...
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
you passed out while setting up your phones timer to time how long it would take before you to passed out.
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
I have no idea how but i got a hold of a blue food dye packet. And proceeded to rub it all over my tits. So yeah i'd say its safe to say i'll be known as smurfette for a while
He said he actually "met" me for the first time through a picture his housemate had of me, drunk and passed out in a pool of my own vomit, on the floor of his basement.
I woke up in a stranger's bed wearing nothing but santa socks.
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
Randomize
