Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
Just tapped my penis on the head and said "this will be your year buddy."
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
Fuck you fireball...just straight up fuck out of here
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
When I get off work and you're not around to hang out with all I do is lay around in my underwear and eat potatoes.
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
he's single and there are thong briefs.
Randomize
