Someone wrote that you're a whore in one of the bathroom stalls
I didn't know I was popular enough to be hated. This is awesome
eating toast while peeing. You think this what kanye meant by the good life?
he was like "finding out that arrested development was cancelled" bad
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
i think my mom would be mad if i was pregnant. last time i was she grounded me for a week.
I woke him up and he was mumbling something about it being moist, or he peed himself but it was okay.
ps I'm eating candy off our sex sheets. gotta say the only thing better than sweet tarts is sweet tarts with a hint of sex. perfect post vday situation
I guess I made wings because there's chicken everywhere. Even on the walls. 3 of them. It's like a chicken grave yard.
You're too morally constrained. I firmly believe that you should be less concerned with how young she is and more excited by the fact that she's not jailbait by virtue of a legal technicality.
I didn't want to see any of his nipples and now I've seen all three. Thanks.
I can't take my grandparents out somewhere where I've fucked half the staff.
He brought me flowers and then spanked me with a Doctor Who paddle. Pretty good night, as these things go.
Awwwwwww!
I will go to bed dreaming of sexy Olympians carting me on a throne to the beach where they feed me pizza and champaign and massage my head/wash it like the hair dresser does.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
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