The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
Ok, honestly? Periods can't be THAT bad, have you ever tried to shave a ball sack?!
All i have left of him are the magnum X-Large condoms he left in my room, knowing full well that no other guy I hook up with will be able to fill his shoes. He taunts me.
Worst ten minutes of my life, it's was like trying to put a marshmallow in a piggy bank....
Hide in the closet. if you hear me yell patato salad come out swinging.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
Sometimes you've gotta crawl to stay concious
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
the bouncer just handed me a Starbucks bag of pound cake
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
