Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
Is a Chipotle burrito an acceptable "sorry I ran over your cat" gift?
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
When the cab driver starts laughing its a good indication of the standard of girls you are bringing home
Can you send me the pictures of me riding the penis
You should not have followed "the guy who peed in my bed" with "he smells good."
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Randomize
