Please don't tell anyone I peed on your wall.
i made two phi delts show me their dicks in less than 30 words! Take that twitter!
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
We smoked a bowl, ate popcorn, and watched her lava lamp for an hour. it was a quality bonding experience
I don't know how I'm going to know it's her, I only know what she looks like with a wig on
SHE COULD ALREADY BE HERE AND I WOULDN'T EVEN KNOW
I left for five minutes and Chris wound up half in women's clothes, half naked. And the naked half was covered in shamrock stickers.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I just ran your car into a ups truck....but on a up note I have a handle of fireball and breakfast burritos
Note to self:A blacklight toga party at a frat house is a bad idea. Some things cannot be unseen
You may be fancy. But you'll never be having cheesy garlic bread and scotch at 3am fancy.
Well, after a pitcher of beer, I set my ex on fire. It was a little fire, he's fine. How's your night?
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
Randomize
