How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Didn't tell him I was on my period. Then had to surreptitiously remove some uterine lining from his cock.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
I might not be able to enter cuba but that doesn't mean that a cuban can't enter me
she kept peeing on everything and yelling it was now her property.
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
We looked at pictures of a Texas banjo contest from 2006 for a half hour and then were surprised by who won. That stoned.
hand jobs are a waste of time that only lead to arm cramps. Also, where do you look...his eyes, at the penis, at the tv?
yeah the "where to look" question is super awkward
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Egg rolls and cum. Not my worst snack.
I'm sitting in the hospital with him while he's still half drunk with a busted leg because he thought he could do parkour off a rock
Bud light made chelada as a breakfast for those of us with class at 8 am
Randomize
