So I've come to the conclusion that I would cry if I had an ugly baby.
Should have told me the night we were talking about deal breakers that vomming outside your car was one of them. I would have taken a cab back
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
Thanks for your number, i want to ski with you, do party with you and sleep with you. Lucas.
adding to the list of how to lure in freshman boys: take dogs for a walk, yell at them from across the street, sit on the curb at 3 in the morning sobbing
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
The cops just came to this party I'm at and ate all of our snacks
Dude just crushed our bbq lays and told us to quiet down
I came home to him frying bacon to put in his beer. He said bacon beer lights, taste the awesomer rockies
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
just made a presentation to 40 students and my professor about morals and ethical issues..still drunk. at 8am. I wish I could remember how it went.
We should form a club for all of us that have stabbed a sibling with a fork!
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
