My recently uploaded pictures to facebook: Me partying on Beale St. with a single girl on each arm. Ex's recently upload pictures: Several pictures of cats. I win.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
I just got hit on by my highschool french teacher. I need to stop going to this bar.
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
We went from zero to drunk tank in 45 minutes.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
You're a brave, albeit stupid soul for wanting in on the fuckery that comes attached to my vagina
I got confused. The music was loud, porn was playing, people were grinding, there were hand jobs.
Randomize
